I wasn't going to do a recap of yesterday's episode, but as I was watching this morning (come on, with the promise of Rafe/Nicole, I couldn't RESIST), I thought "Why not?!" It's not scored, but there's Abe flail and the obvious Rafe/Nicole freak-out. Today's recap (Thursday, I mean.) will be posted after airing today.
***
Nicole's pat-down gone awry ends up with Nicole in Rafe's lap. She wants to hang around there for a moment or two, and that's fine with him. AND OMFG THEY KISS AND MY WORLD MAKES SENSE. OMG ARIANNA, YOU COCKBLOCKERRRRRR. She starts yelling at Rafe and wonders how Nicole gets men to just fall into her arms. Nicole replies, "Technically, I fell into his arms..." Ari thinks this is all about Sami, and Nicole so astutely points out that Sami's not there. (Sidenote: apparently it's the middle of the day here, too. OMG DAYS, get your short-term timeline together.) Ari thinks that he wants to get caught by Sami to make her jealous and admit she loves him. Rafe tells her it's none of her business, and Ari decides she needs a drink. Seriously. Get one, Ari. I know you hate Nicole and have good reason to, but this is the greatest thing in my life right now and I can't have you ruining it! Nicole asks if Ari was right about Rafe's intentions, and he tries to make Nicole feel better while his sister looks on in disgust. He says he and Nicole were thrown out like trash by their respective lovers. Nicole calls Rafe the PERFECT GUY. fdjojdjfdjoijoijfdoi. DEAD DEAD DEAD. Nicole doesn't know what to believe, and Rafe thinks she's been drinking too much. And they leave together. MY GHOST IS DYING.
Hope wants justice done, and Bo says, YES! Justice will be served. Julie continues to blame Bo for the destruction of Hope's life because apparently, Hope was never a relatively independent, capable woman, so how DARE Bo abandon her when she MOVES OUT OF THE HOUSE. Julie is going to drive me to Hope's crazy pills, I just know it. Meanwhile, Adrienne and Justin talk at the pub about Hope, which somehow segues into what they once were [Adrienne, just send him far, far away, please?]. Before it starts, ABE CARVER PRESIDENT OF SALEM (SHOW SOME RESPECT) walks into the courtroom for Hope's hearing. Justin too, but no1curr about him. With the addition of character witnesses, the prosecution wants to withdraw the original deal for a 10-year sentence and get her the full 30-year penalty for her crimes. Oh, also Arianna walks into the courtroom around this time.
In all randomness, Brady visits his mother's tomb, and it's actually kind of sad.
Sami and EJ kiss their way toward a bedroom, WHILE SON WATCHES THEM. EWWWWW. After getting caught almost FORNICATING in front of her son, Sami picks up Johnny's penguin toy and thinks of Rafe. LOLLLLL. That has to be a boner-killer for Elvis. Sami continues to kiss EJ to forget about Rafe, and EJ says they don't have to sleep together yet. Sami wants to ~wait until their wedding night to have sex (again), and EJ is apparently all for it. Oh EJ how you've grown, I remark in a flat tone.
Justin gives his testimony about Hope's character~ and doesn't believe she should go free, but thinks Salem needs her to get treatment. In the words of Abe fucking Carver, Hope is truly one of Salem's finest. He believes he'll be victim again if his friend is buried by the system. Arianna doesn't want the system to treat Hope differently than it would treat her. Hope has to pay for her crimes! Just before the judge makes her decision, the defense calls Bo to the stand. Bo says he's just as responsible as Hope for her crimes. Then he proceeds to blame the crazy pills. Hope is sentenced to two years with visitation rights, so she can see her daughter and get psychiatric help. Hope seems to be relieved about a way lighter sentence than her original deal, even though she was so stubborn about making sure she's fairly punished. Bo apologizes for not doing more, but now Julie thinks he saved the day. Take off your crazy person wig, woman. Make up your mind!
Everyone hugs Hope after the trial, INCLUDING ABE CARVER. LUCKY BITCH. Bo gives Hope a speech that's probably about being there for her and stuff. But IDK, because I'm kind of done with this storyline, since it's sort of kind of resolved. Now let's just get to the part where the show has to pretend Bo and Carly are together still, so we can resolve THAT too.
Sami goes to the pub looking for Caroline, but spots Brady drinking. Oh, I'm sure this will be just...lovely. She asks about Brady's beer and Brady asks about her engagement ring. The most mature adult step-sibling discussion ever, you guys. Brady is "celebrating" being done with Nicole and tells Sami that she is not so different than the woman. Sami's addiction isn't LIES like Nicole, it is EJ DIMERA! Sami thinks Brady is worse than her grandma and dad put together, and he LIKES them, so he thinks it's good company to be in. He tells Sami that when he left town a few years ago, she was a spoiled-rotten brat (Sami: "Pot, meet Kettle!"), but he came back and she was all new and improved after meeting RAAAAFE, and she screwed it up. Brady tells her to have a beer on him, because she's gonna need it marrying into the Dimeras. Sami leaves Rafe a message as she's leaving the pub. She runs into Arianna, and asks about her brother's whereabouts. Ari got the firsthand show of Rafecole of Our Lives and THEN got to see Hope practically let off the hook for her crimes. So I"m guessing she's a little bitter right now when she tells Sami that he's probably at Nicole's place RIGHT NOW. Sami takes this the wrong way, obviously, because she thinks Rafe is arresting Nicole and she HAS to see this. Sami, you are so juvenile, lol. Arresting her for WHAT, exactly?
Rafe gets Nicole to her apartment, and kisses her as they stumble to her door. She asks Rafe what he wants, and he says he USED to know and talks about Sami and Sydney. Nicole invites Rafe inside. Nicole pours drinks for herself and Rafe. "You know what's weird?" "That I'm still standing?" They talk about Sydney, and she's trying to let her go since she can't be part of her life anymore. He ignores a call from Sami, and Nicole thinks it's work, so she wonders if he's supposed to do that. FBI guys need a break too. Nicole is smart, even when drunk. She knows there's something going on here that she doesn't know. Rafe calls her uncomplicated (HA!), but gives her credit for not pretending like she doesn't lie. Rafe says he's always felt a little spark ~there with Nicole (if only...). She asks if he ~likes her, and he says, "WHY NOT!" She says he's going to have to prove he's not lying by getting naked. Nicole senses Rafe's hesitation, and maybe he doesn't want her as bad as she thinks he does. He tells her to think again, and proceeds to strip for her. OMG LOL.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
I'm sorry I called you a gap-toothed bitch. It's not your fault you're so gap-toothed.
Today's theme of the show was admitting you were wrong about people. Also, crazy people. But who cares, because the Cheatin' Heart is where it's at. It's where all my porno fantasies come true. In a less pervy way, I swear. Or not. IDK.
(-2) Hope's public defender doesn't understand why she didn't get a better lawyer, and Hope insists it would be a waste of time and money, since she's going to jail. Bo protests this. Hope doesn't want to keep discussing this. She plead guilty, it's over! She needs to pay! But Bo aks if Sierra should have to pay, too. Bo says Sierra needs Hope, but Hope thinks Demon Child is better off without her. Bo calls her a COWARD. OMFG. (+3 LOL points) Doug decides to take Bo for a walk, and apparently they're trusting JULIE to reason with her? (-1) Because JULIE was so reasonable last week. And she's still blaming Bo for everything. Classy bitch. (-1) Julie tells Hope that she's lost her way, and they'll help her find her way back. But they can't throw everything away! Doug, Julie and Bo have another conference about Hope, then Bo talks to her public defender. Hope has doubts about what Bo is up to, and Doug and Julie think she should trust him. He comes back and announces to Hope that there's been a change of plans. GASP. I haven't been hating this story lately, but bah. Nothing even happened today. (-1)
(+4) Shady guy starts choking Melanie when Nathan runs in. He gets in a rather uneventful fight with Pat Monahan (or random hobo, drug addict, common criminal, take your pick either way -5 for being gross), but injures his arm in the process. The guy runs away. Come on, no knife? Nathan checks up on Melanie to make sure she's okay after being nearly strangled, and they're touching and this would be an opportune moment for Philip to walk in for maximum awkwardness. She'll have bruises on her neck, but no permanent damage so I don't have to cut a bitch. (+1) She notes that the guy was obviously not very strong, but Nathan says the strangler was able to take HIM down. So what we learn is that Melanie is clearly tougher than Nathan. (+2) Melanie asks about Nathan's arm. He says it's fine, but Melanie knows he wouldn't admit if it was that bad anyway. She tells him to get an X-ray, he calls her Dr. Melanie(+1) , and she corrects him - "Dr. Kiriakis." (+1) Snap. They've had enough of the clinic in the ghetto for a day, and he offers to take Melanie home. Just outside of the Brady pub, Melanie tells Nathan she can get the rest of the way alone. Score one for independent Melanie. Free bitch, baby. (+4)
(-2) Back at Stephanie's humble abode, Ian tries to get the paternity test results but is creeped out by hacking into a hospital computer with the blessed mother staring at him. (LOL +3) Stephanie continues to freak out because Chloe's baby is important to her very existence. (-1) Ian gets through the firewall, and finds Dana Scott's file, but the results aren't in. Not GOOD enough for Miss Teen Pageant Racecar Driver Girl! Ian explains there may be a backup at the lab, and Stephanie curses! (-1) Nathan chooses such a time to arrive home, and he is confused at the scene he has happened upon. "What's going on? Who the hell are you?" This is how to politely greet guests in your home. Etiquette lessons from the young Dr. Horton. (+3) Nathan apologizes for being rude, as he's on edge because of the clinic attack. He excuses himself to take a shower. Boo, show this part instead of Stephanie. Anyway, before Ian leaves, he says that a girl as pretty and as smart as Stephanie shouldn't have to fight to keep anyone. (+1) Thank you, creepy Ian. Yet another person who doesn't understand why she's so desperate to keep Nathan. But according to Stephanie, Ian doesn't understand. Stephanie LOVES Nathan. Psycho.
(-3) Stephanie freaks out when she learns that Nathan was just with Melanie. He explains that the guy tried to strangle Red, and Stephanie jokes that the guy must know her well. Yes, Stephanie - a victim of rape, who was also kidnapped and rescued by MELANIE - is joking about Melanie being attacked. (-4) Classy. NATHAN IS NOT AMUSED. Stephanie is an actual bitch. She goes on about how everything turned out okay, blah blah blah, before she tells Nathan to get an X-ray, and then looks worriedly at her computer.
(+2) While Stefano goes on about how what if Rafe or Sami find out that Elvis arranged Sydney's kidnapping, Sami walks in and confusedly asks what he said. Sami says she overheard Stefano talking about EJ keeping Sydney away from Sami. Stefano tries to talk himself out of it (LMAO +4), and Sami tells him let EJ answer! Because THAT's how you'll get a straight answer. For sure. Fo' sho! (-2) IDK, I'm only paying attention to the background because Lexie walks into the mansion and greets and hugs Stefano! Lexie!!! (+3) She's there to hear EJ saying that he just wants to give Sami some time away from Sydney after the wedding, and he wants to ~occupy some of her time. Or something like that. (-1) But yes, Lexie hears this, and is shocked to hear they're getting married. Lexie is pure class, so she congratulates them, and jokingly says she's worried about Sami considering who her in-laws will be. (+2 whatever, she was cute) She offers to help Sami with the wedding, and Sami jokes about prescribing her family sedatives. (+1 okay Sami, I'll give you this one.)
(-1) Once they're alone, Lexie tells E.J. she's happy for him. I would get mad at Lexie for not seeing how stupid this is, but 1) she's a Carver and 2) she's telling E.J. how proud she is of him for getting what he wants and turning his life around, but now he's looking kind of guilty. Yeah, you should feel bad for getting undeserved words of kindness from Lexie Carver. (-1) Lexie believes in EJ and shit, but she's worried about Rafe. (+3 for juxtaposition of this scene being followed by a Rafe and Nicole scene.) Lexie hopes EJ is right about Rafe, and EJ says he and Sami are m2b. (VOM. -2) Meanwhile, Stefano is alone with Same tells her he was wrong about her or something and tries to hug her. LOL. (+2) Sami obnoxiously interrupts EJ and Lexie, and announces that Stefano was actually nice to her. OMFG, WOW SAMI. Lexie thinks if Stefano can actually be nice to Sami, maybe he'll let Lexie talk him into diet and exercise. Once in the privacy of the Dimera foyer, Lexie discusses her doubts with Stefano, and thinks there's more to the engagement than what's being said. Stefano hopes that with the marriage, the past will just go away. (+4 juxtaposition points because they cut to Nicole asking why Rafe is dwelling in the past..) After Lexie leaves, Sami rambles and EJ kisses her and shuts her up. Oh, look, I stopped paying attention. (-3 because I'm sure it was gross)
(+5) Nicole cries at the bar (-1 for anybody making Nicole cry), while Rafe lurks and creeps on her from outside. jositfjofjiot :DDDD He jokes about always meeting like this, and she tells him to go away. IT'S LOVE. Rafe apologizes for the way he acted last time with Nicole, and wants a chance to make it up to her. She refuses, throwing her drink in his face. (+2) Nicole wants to be left alone, but Rafe at least offers to buy her a drink to replace the one she threw. She can buy her own drink though, and as she's gathering up the contents of her purse, Rafe spots the missing CD recording of EJ's confession. (+4) As Rafe walks away, OMG this creepy guy at the bar recognizes Nicole from porn. HE CALLS HER MISTY, HER PORN NAME! I AM DYING DYING DYING. (+4) Ew, gross, tho. He's hitting on her and calling his friend about his favorite porn star (-2), and Nicole is mortified. (Sadface for Nicole. -2) Rafe threatens him to apologize and get the hell out. KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR. (+2) Poor Nicole is crying again. (SERIOUSLY? :( -2)
(+10) Rafe apologizes again for the way he treated Nicole, and she thanks him for helping her. Nicole and Rafe bond over drinks (+2) and loving EJ and Sami, but not being able to make it work. Rafe tells Nicole about how unfair it is that she did everything for E.J. and now he's acting ~sanctimonious and he's marrying Sami? WHAT. A JERK, THAT EJ. Nicole sarcastically calls EJ a Prince. (+1) Rafe says Sami thinks he's obsessed with Elvis, and seeing evil where there isn't because HE'S just JEALOUS. LOL, Nicole thinks the same thing we're all thinking - JFC, REALLY SAMI? (-5 for Sami, but +3 for Nicole) She feels bad for him, and says the next round of drinks is on her. Rafe tells Nicole all about what he and Sami went through when Sydney went missing, and Nicole starts to feel guilty - especially at the part where EJ made Sami believe Sydney was dead. He asks Nicole to tell him that EJ's a good guy, but she knows she can't honestly say that. (+1 THANK YOU) Nicole wonders why Rafe keeps bringing up the past. Nicole says Rafe's not normal, he's FBI. And then wonders if he's on the job. ARE YOU WEARING A WIRE? She keeps trying to look down Rafe's shirt, and he asks if she wants to frisk him. (OH MY GOD. +5) Nicole makes Rafe stand up, because she is about to give rafe a proper pat-down like she learned in prison. Before she can, she stumbles drunkenly onto him and they fall into his chair and she's right in his lap. (OMG OMG OMG +5, but I do have to subtract points, because officially, Rafe's just playing her right now, tho. WHY U DO DIS, WRITERS? -3)
(-1) Daniel wants to know what's up with Chloe and Carly, and they say that their big secret is that they're spending girl time together at the spa for Chloe's birthday. Daniel's mind is blown by his womens hanging out together, and he wishes he didn't have to miss it. Carly's all, BITCH you weren't invited anyway. (+2) He and Chloe say it can be the start of a beautiful friendship, while Carly looks upset and uncomfortable. (-3 she does this a lot) Chloe admits that she was wrong about Carly, and apologizes. (+1 because that seems to be the theme of today's edition.) Dr. Dan talks to Melanie on the phone, and says they'll wait for her if she meets them at the pier. He oh-so-subtly tries to get rid of Chloe (-2 because don't we all wish it were that easy?), and just straight up tells Chloe that he wants to discuss her BIRTHDAY SURPRISE with Melanie when she gets there. Chloe agrees to leave, so as not to be spoiled. Once Melanie gets to the pier, her parents immediately spot the bruises on her neck. (-2 because I can't see it. Her neck is just extra red, if anything.) She is freaked out by all the parenting going on at once. Anyway, they move on Melanie thinks everything's possible and is excited about the baby and about Chloe and Carly being friends. Daniel and Melanie leave together, and Carly hopes to god Melanie is right. She calls Chloe to tell her for the millionth time that her results will be ready in the morning. (-3)
(+10) For Nathan's hair. And the fact that he was whining about his arm all day, and I was amused. If Philip were on today, the hair quotient would go way up. I'm also adding points, though, because Stephanie's new old friend Ian had his hair down when he started asking Stephanie about what she needs~, and suddenly we cut to him with his tied back. What the heck. Magic hair points.
(-10) For added, less amusing confusion, I couldn't tell if it was day or night in Salem. Hope's case seemed to be JUST starting, which would lead me to believe it's day. I assumed the Cheatin' Heart people (Rafe/Nicole, Daniel/Chloe/Carly from yesterday as time carried over today) were nighttime, especially since they're all ready for tomorrow. Melanie and Nathan were walking around in daylight after their shift at the clinic - and for comparison, Philip dropped Melanie off (in yesterday's) for this very shift, and was seen drinking at the Brady Pub past 5pm afterward. SO. I AM CONFUSED.
(+12) Michelle Obama appearance. And being cute with Stefano!
(+10) Rafe and Nicole: we're making them more canon here at AOOL just by sheer will. OMFG.
Apparently, this gives us a total of 56 points (I think?), I thought that Rafe and Nicole would send the score flying through the roof, but it was a pretty boring episode otherwise.
3 Happy Abes
Abe is happy that his wife is adorable, and he's happy that I'm happy that Rafe and Nicole are so becoming canon, but he was just kind of bored otherwise.
Hope pleads guilty, Arianna shows up at the bar and finds Nicole in Rafe's lap ("Are you out of your freakin' mind?!"), and EJ and Sami continue to be boring.
(-2) Hope's public defender doesn't understand why she didn't get a better lawyer, and Hope insists it would be a waste of time and money, since she's going to jail. Bo protests this. Hope doesn't want to keep discussing this. She plead guilty, it's over! She needs to pay! But Bo aks if Sierra should have to pay, too. Bo says Sierra needs Hope, but Hope thinks Demon Child is better off without her. Bo calls her a COWARD. OMFG. (+3 LOL points) Doug decides to take Bo for a walk, and apparently they're trusting JULIE to reason with her? (-1) Because JULIE was so reasonable last week. And she's still blaming Bo for everything. Classy bitch. (-1) Julie tells Hope that she's lost her way, and they'll help her find her way back. But they can't throw everything away! Doug, Julie and Bo have another conference about Hope, then Bo talks to her public defender. Hope has doubts about what Bo is up to, and Doug and Julie think she should trust him. He comes back and announces to Hope that there's been a change of plans. GASP. I haven't been hating this story lately, but bah. Nothing even happened today. (-1)
(+4) Shady guy starts choking Melanie when Nathan runs in. He gets in a rather uneventful fight with Pat Monahan (or random hobo, drug addict, common criminal, take your pick either way -5 for being gross), but injures his arm in the process. The guy runs away. Come on, no knife? Nathan checks up on Melanie to make sure she's okay after being nearly strangled, and they're touching and this would be an opportune moment for Philip to walk in for maximum awkwardness. She'll have bruises on her neck, but no permanent damage so I don't have to cut a bitch. (+1) She notes that the guy was obviously not very strong, but Nathan says the strangler was able to take HIM down. So what we learn is that Melanie is clearly tougher than Nathan. (+2) Melanie asks about Nathan's arm. He says it's fine, but Melanie knows he wouldn't admit if it was that bad anyway. She tells him to get an X-ray, he calls her Dr. Melanie(+1) , and she corrects him - "Dr. Kiriakis." (+1) Snap. They've had enough of the clinic in the ghetto for a day, and he offers to take Melanie home. Just outside of the Brady pub, Melanie tells Nathan she can get the rest of the way alone. Score one for independent Melanie. Free bitch, baby. (+4)
(-2) Back at Stephanie's humble abode, Ian tries to get the paternity test results but is creeped out by hacking into a hospital computer with the blessed mother staring at him. (LOL +3) Stephanie continues to freak out because Chloe's baby is important to her very existence. (-1) Ian gets through the firewall, and finds Dana Scott's file, but the results aren't in. Not GOOD enough for Miss Teen Pageant Racecar Driver Girl! Ian explains there may be a backup at the lab, and Stephanie curses! (-1) Nathan chooses such a time to arrive home, and he is confused at the scene he has happened upon. "What's going on? Who the hell are you?" This is how to politely greet guests in your home. Etiquette lessons from the young Dr. Horton. (+3) Nathan apologizes for being rude, as he's on edge because of the clinic attack. He excuses himself to take a shower. Boo, show this part instead of Stephanie. Anyway, before Ian leaves, he says that a girl as pretty and as smart as Stephanie shouldn't have to fight to keep anyone. (+1) Thank you, creepy Ian. Yet another person who doesn't understand why she's so desperate to keep Nathan. But according to Stephanie, Ian doesn't understand. Stephanie LOVES Nathan. Psycho.
(-3) Stephanie freaks out when she learns that Nathan was just with Melanie. He explains that the guy tried to strangle Red, and Stephanie jokes that the guy must know her well. Yes, Stephanie - a victim of rape, who was also kidnapped and rescued by MELANIE - is joking about Melanie being attacked. (-4) Classy. NATHAN IS NOT AMUSED. Stephanie is an actual bitch. She goes on about how everything turned out okay, blah blah blah, before she tells Nathan to get an X-ray, and then looks worriedly at her computer.
(+2) While Stefano goes on about how what if Rafe or Sami find out that Elvis arranged Sydney's kidnapping, Sami walks in and confusedly asks what he said. Sami says she overheard Stefano talking about EJ keeping Sydney away from Sami. Stefano tries to talk himself out of it (LMAO +4), and Sami tells him let EJ answer! Because THAT's how you'll get a straight answer. For sure. Fo' sho! (-2) IDK, I'm only paying attention to the background because Lexie walks into the mansion and greets and hugs Stefano! Lexie!!! (+3) She's there to hear EJ saying that he just wants to give Sami some time away from Sydney after the wedding, and he wants to ~occupy some of her time. Or something like that. (-1) But yes, Lexie hears this, and is shocked to hear they're getting married. Lexie is pure class, so she congratulates them, and jokingly says she's worried about Sami considering who her in-laws will be. (+2 whatever, she was cute) She offers to help Sami with the wedding, and Sami jokes about prescribing her family sedatives. (+1 okay Sami, I'll give you this one.)
(-1) Once they're alone, Lexie tells E.J. she's happy for him. I would get mad at Lexie for not seeing how stupid this is, but 1) she's a Carver and 2) she's telling E.J. how proud she is of him for getting what he wants and turning his life around, but now he's looking kind of guilty. Yeah, you should feel bad for getting undeserved words of kindness from Lexie Carver. (-1) Lexie believes in EJ and shit, but she's worried about Rafe. (+3 for juxtaposition of this scene being followed by a Rafe and Nicole scene.) Lexie hopes EJ is right about Rafe, and EJ says he and Sami are m2b. (VOM. -2) Meanwhile, Stefano is alone with Same tells her he was wrong about her or something and tries to hug her. LOL. (+2) Sami obnoxiously interrupts EJ and Lexie, and announces that Stefano was actually nice to her. OMFG, WOW SAMI. Lexie thinks if Stefano can actually be nice to Sami, maybe he'll let Lexie talk him into diet and exercise. Once in the privacy of the Dimera foyer, Lexie discusses her doubts with Stefano, and thinks there's more to the engagement than what's being said. Stefano hopes that with the marriage, the past will just go away. (+4 juxtaposition points because they cut to Nicole asking why Rafe is dwelling in the past..) After Lexie leaves, Sami rambles and EJ kisses her and shuts her up. Oh, look, I stopped paying attention. (-3 because I'm sure it was gross)
(+5) Nicole cries at the bar (-1 for anybody making Nicole cry), while Rafe lurks and creeps on her from outside. jositfjofjiot :DDDD He jokes about always meeting like this, and she tells him to go away. IT'S LOVE. Rafe apologizes for the way he acted last time with Nicole, and wants a chance to make it up to her. She refuses, throwing her drink in his face. (+2) Nicole wants to be left alone, but Rafe at least offers to buy her a drink to replace the one she threw. She can buy her own drink though, and as she's gathering up the contents of her purse, Rafe spots the missing CD recording of EJ's confession. (+4) As Rafe walks away, OMG this creepy guy at the bar recognizes Nicole from porn. HE CALLS HER MISTY, HER PORN NAME! I AM DYING DYING DYING. (+4) Ew, gross, tho. He's hitting on her and calling his friend about his favorite porn star (-2), and Nicole is mortified. (Sadface for Nicole. -2) Rafe threatens him to apologize and get the hell out. KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR. (+2) Poor Nicole is crying again. (SERIOUSLY? :( -2)
(+10) Rafe apologizes again for the way he treated Nicole, and she thanks him for helping her. Nicole and Rafe bond over drinks (+2) and loving EJ and Sami, but not being able to make it work. Rafe tells Nicole about how unfair it is that she did everything for E.J. and now he's acting ~sanctimonious and he's marrying Sami? WHAT. A JERK, THAT EJ. Nicole sarcastically calls EJ a Prince. (+1) Rafe says Sami thinks he's obsessed with Elvis, and seeing evil where there isn't because HE'S just JEALOUS. LOL, Nicole thinks the same thing we're all thinking - JFC, REALLY SAMI? (-5 for Sami, but +3 for Nicole) She feels bad for him, and says the next round of drinks is on her. Rafe tells Nicole all about what he and Sami went through when Sydney went missing, and Nicole starts to feel guilty - especially at the part where EJ made Sami believe Sydney was dead. He asks Nicole to tell him that EJ's a good guy, but she knows she can't honestly say that. (+1 THANK YOU) Nicole wonders why Rafe keeps bringing up the past. Nicole says Rafe's not normal, he's FBI. And then wonders if he's on the job. ARE YOU WEARING A WIRE? She keeps trying to look down Rafe's shirt, and he asks if she wants to frisk him. (OH MY GOD. +5) Nicole makes Rafe stand up, because she is about to give rafe a proper pat-down like she learned in prison. Before she can, she stumbles drunkenly onto him and they fall into his chair and she's right in his lap. (OMG OMG OMG +5, but I do have to subtract points, because officially, Rafe's just playing her right now, tho. WHY U DO DIS, WRITERS? -3)
(-1) Daniel wants to know what's up with Chloe and Carly, and they say that their big secret is that they're spending girl time together at the spa for Chloe's birthday. Daniel's mind is blown by his womens hanging out together, and he wishes he didn't have to miss it. Carly's all, BITCH you weren't invited anyway. (+2) He and Chloe say it can be the start of a beautiful friendship, while Carly looks upset and uncomfortable. (-3 she does this a lot) Chloe admits that she was wrong about Carly, and apologizes. (+1 because that seems to be the theme of today's edition.) Dr. Dan talks to Melanie on the phone, and says they'll wait for her if she meets them at the pier. He oh-so-subtly tries to get rid of Chloe (-2 because don't we all wish it were that easy?), and just straight up tells Chloe that he wants to discuss her BIRTHDAY SURPRISE with Melanie when she gets there. Chloe agrees to leave, so as not to be spoiled. Once Melanie gets to the pier, her parents immediately spot the bruises on her neck. (-2 because I can't see it. Her neck is just extra red, if anything.) She is freaked out by all the parenting going on at once. Anyway, they move on Melanie thinks everything's possible and is excited about the baby and about Chloe and Carly being friends. Daniel and Melanie leave together, and Carly hopes to god Melanie is right. She calls Chloe to tell her for the millionth time that her results will be ready in the morning. (-3)
Bonus Points, Grand Total + Abe Rating
(+10) For Nathan's hair. And the fact that he was whining about his arm all day, and I was amused. If Philip were on today, the hair quotient would go way up. I'm also adding points, though, because Stephanie's new old friend Ian had his hair down when he started asking Stephanie about what she needs~, and suddenly we cut to him with his tied back. What the heck. Magic hair points.
(-10) For added, less amusing confusion, I couldn't tell if it was day or night in Salem. Hope's case seemed to be JUST starting, which would lead me to believe it's day. I assumed the Cheatin' Heart people (Rafe/Nicole, Daniel/Chloe/Carly from yesterday as time carried over today) were nighttime, especially since they're all ready for tomorrow. Melanie and Nathan were walking around in daylight after their shift at the clinic - and for comparison, Philip dropped Melanie off (in yesterday's) for this very shift, and was seen drinking at the Brady Pub past 5pm afterward. SO. I AM CONFUSED.
(+12) Michelle Obama appearance. And being cute with Stefano!
(+10) Rafe and Nicole: we're making them more canon here at AOOL just by sheer will. OMFG.
Apparently, this gives us a total of 56 points (I think?), I thought that Rafe and Nicole would send the score flying through the roof, but it was a pretty boring episode otherwise.
3 Happy Abes
Abe is happy that his wife is adorable, and he's happy that I'm happy that Rafe and Nicole are so becoming canon, but he was just kind of bored otherwise.
Tomrrow's Salem Time Warp
Hope pleads guilty, Arianna shows up at the bar and finds Nicole in Rafe's lap ("Are you out of your freakin' mind?!"), and EJ and Sami continue to be boring.
A nun walks into a bar...
Ugh, I meant to score this, but my battery is dying. So here's a long wordy (only sort-of edited) recap. Apparently, my posting of these recaps on school days depends on if I can catch it Hulu and/or youtube. IDK, we'll just wing it I guess.
But, to be honest, if I did score this, I think one story would have sent us over the roof in points. You'll know which one I mean.
***
Philip and Chloe hug it out bitch at the pier. I like Philip and Chloe as friends, whatever. That's all I have to say. Nathan walks by, and apologizes for interrupting whatever is going on. Aww, how considerate! He says he meant to call Philip, and they talk about their hospital brosiness for a little bit before he leaves. Chloe freaks out because Nathan KNOWS about her, and she thought he might have figured it out. Aww, come on Chloe. Nathan, though very adorable, is almost as dense as Daniel. And Philip knows Nathan would run straight to Melanie if he knew.
A Doctor walks into a bar and asks one-night stand/baby mama/old friend etc. for her opinion on the bracelet he wants to give to Chloe to wear to the opera for her birthday tomorrow. He says it's their first public birthday together. LOLLLL REMEMBER WHEN CHLOE WAS CHEATING ON LUCAS, SO DANIEL AND CHLOE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET. haahahaha, I'm mean. He's also excited that he gets to tell people he's pregnant soon. (Oh, Chloe's the one who's pregnant.) Carly gets all uncomfortable, but blames her mood on how much she's been working. Daniel tells her he and Mel are worried about her, since she blames herself for the Bo and Hope debacle. Aww, Daniel and Carly are sweet though. He mentions the baby more, making Carly uncomfortable again. Daniel notices something is up, and then she leaves suddenly.
Stephanie, preventing Melanie from finding out why she's REALLY on the computer at St. Mary's, lies about checking up on Daniel's patient for PR purposes. Crazycakes is totally subtle in hoping that Melanie gets the job at this hospital that is across the town from Nathan. She pulls a psychotic fake-nice act that is cracking me up and freaking Melanie out. As Little Red skips off, Crazy continues to peruse hospital records, but when she comes across Chloe's file, access is denied. She seems surprised. Really? Because a PR person should really be given access to paternity test results, Stephanie. She thinks REALLY hard about what she can do, because if Chloe blows up Philip and Melanie, it'll blow up Nathan and her, and her life depends on it. AND OMG SHE HAS AN IDEA!
Sami and E.J. make out in the SUPER SECRET LIVING ROOM at the Dimera mansion, and so what a shock when Stefano walks in on this. Will walks into the room and tries to hold back his vom as Sami's going on about the wedding. "YOU SHOULDN'T BE WEARIN' WHITE AND HE CAN'T AFFORD NO RAAAAANG." Will points out that Sami's had about 29309 weddings, and for some reason thinks she can have a traditional one. Will is obviously my voice on the show, and see that is so WRONG (and then factor in WHOM she's marrying!). Sami acts indignant while Will tells her things she needs to hear, and she wonders why Will wasn't so mean when she was with Rafe. Will tells her, just as he sees Elvis walk into the foyer, that Rafe was different because THAT could have worked. LOL, sneaky bitch. I love Will. He's awesome. EJ hugs Sami as Will leaves the house. LOLLLL okay, Samanther. You say marrying him is what's best for your kids, but she is so going to lose~ Will over it. Bitch, please. Anyway, when E.J. asks if she's okay, she says Will was a "walk in the park" compared to her grandma and dad.
Meanwhile, at the pub, Caroline is complaining about Hope's lack of lawyer when Roman gets a call from Sami saying she has something to tell him. He knows something's up because when she calls him "daddy" (no dirty joke, PLEASE), she's either totaled the car or gotten a D in Spanish. When she replies "Si, si senor," he calls her Samantha Jean. LOLLL. IDK it was actually kind of cute. She tells him she'll see him at the Pub.
Sami and E.J. show up at the pub, but LOL, Caroline doesn't want E.J. present when Sami tells them her news. Oh, Caroline Bluth, you have bigger problems! Sami breaks the news of her engagement, trying to assure them that she's happy. Roman believes that she really has lost her mind. EJ says he understands why they'd be upset, and Roman reminds him that they both have clear memories. Come on, E.J. If somebody raped Sydney, you know you would KILL that guy. So yeah. You're kind of lucky Roman hasn't shot you yet, today. He makes this whole speech about how he loves Sami and respects her and hopes Sydney will learn from them setting such a good example. GAG. Okay. The Bradys aren't buying it, of course, and now Sami refuses to talk to Roman alone, because she WANTS everybody's approval, but if they don't give it to her, then she'll just cut them off. Oh my god.
Ew, at the Kiriakis mansion, Brady is like...ravishing Nicole. He makes me uncomfortable now. Assaulting a woman after sex does that to a guy. And you know what? I just ate, so excuse me while I phone in the recap of their scenes. After they pant and undress each, Nicole wants to take this somewhere a little more private. What? The common areas of the mansion where crazy people live? Not private enough? Crazy Viv can walk in, at any time, on her husband's ex-wife and her husband's grandson ~fornicating. It's a moot point, though, when Brady freaks out decides everything going on here is WRONG. (Seriously, Brady. You forgot the production crew, cameras and cheesy music. GET IT? Because Nicole used to be in PORN!) "What is wrong with you, we were about to make love!" So tender, Nikki. Brady compares sex with Nicole to a drug, and then goes into asshole mode. He basically says he told her he loved her, only to use her for sex, and he doesn't care about her. Brady is DONE with her! Asshole. Please die now.
Rafe is sick of playing by the rules, so he calls a secret person who's surprised he has his number. Rafe tells his phone friend that there's more where that came from. I get the feeling this is a 900 number. Rafe needs help to woo Nicole. He waits at the beach for this mysterious other person and OH MY GOD, LOL. It's Victor. Um, odd scene pairing plus the "beach" setting? EXTRA POINTS. Rafe tells Victor that he has proof that Nicole has something on E.J, and Vic wonders why he should care. Victor thinks they have different ideas about what E.J. "has coming to him." Rafe wants him to lose Sami, whereas Victor wants him to lose an appendage or two. Victor calls E.J. a putz when Rafe tells him what he knows. I love funny Victor. Since Rafe can't use the evidence he stole from Nicole, he needs Victor's help in getting her to tell on Elvis. Victor gives Rafe advice in hopes that he can separate her from Brady, and says he'll owe Rafe a big one. He can pay for their wedding okay. The advice is basically, "she acts tough, but she has a weak spot." Rafe needs to know Nicole's weakness, and Victor reminds him that Nicole was a PORN STAR. OMG PRAISE KANYESUS, THEY'RE ACTUALLY BRINGING THIS UP. MY DAY IS MADE, I AM DYING. THIS IS THE GREATEST THING EVER IN THE HISTORY OF "AOOL." I LOVE PORNSTAR NICOLE. Anyway, Rafe wants Victor to tell him something he didn't already know, and Victor tells him about Nicole's dad forcing her into porn and that she is a broken little girl, just looking for her knight in shining armor. SO HE TELLS RAFE TO MAKE A MOVE. OMG GG-gdsgjfoifdojjdso I CAN'T. YOU GUYS. YOU GUYYYYYYYYS. He needs to convince Nicole that he can help her, and she'll give Rafe what she wants. OMG I AM SHAKING AND CRYING.
Philip drops off Melanie at the free clinic so she could complete her hours there, and he is NOT impressed, even though it's a FREE clinic that was just opened. He, too, is really hoping she gets the job at St. Mary's. He and Stephanie are m2b. Apparently Sister Anne missed her appointment with Melanie. Random. Anyway, Philly doesn't want to leave her alone in a ~dangerous neighborhood. AWW. He's presh when he's not cheating on his wife. She mocks him for freaking out in the ghetto. Salem's ghetto is probably just the one street that has a broken street light. That and the pier. She assures him that she's perfectly fine, and that she's working with another doctor, so of course it's Nathan! Philip is clearly very comfortable with them working together on a more regular basis. They'll flirt over flu shots and figure out that they're dating/married to crazy people. So, naturally, Philip acts more awkward. He and Nathan trade territorial banter before Nathan remembers that Melanie is actually in the room. Melanie is uncomfortable.
Chloe meets Daniel at the bar, and he thinks blue looks great on her. It is orange's complimentary color. Duh, Daniel. He lets her open ONE of her gifts (that she just saw him hiding) on the day before her birthday, so of course it's a box that says "baby" on it. Dan's all sentimental about his first present for his child, and I'm loling at Chloe's paaaaiiin. She' tries to convince Dan she's happy before she excuses herself to the ladies' room. Aaaand, in walks Sister Anne. I've heard this joke before. A nun and a doctor walk into a bar... Anyway. She explains to Daniel why she missed her appointment with Melanie, and let me tell you, it's a soap storyline all on its own! There's a 15-year-old pregnant girl in labor and a drunken mother! He invites Sister Anne to meet his fiance. Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh oh no no.
Carly is at bar again, but it looks like she forgot something. She sees Chloe at the bathroom freaking out, and turns to see Dan and Anne (lolrhyme) sitting together. Oh, Chloe. You were always worried that CARLY was the hussy who'd steal your man, you didn't even THINK about the nun. iCarly walks over to Danne (OTP), and she explains that she came back for her sunglasses. Sister Anne excuses herself before she even got to meet Daniel's fiance. Carly sees the humor in a nun at a bar. Daniel gets a phone call and has an emergency he has to tend to, so he asks Carly to check on Chloe. She calls Chloe to tell her that the coast is clear, but they need to talk before they go home. They talk on the pier and Carly says everything's okay for now, and her test results will be in first thing in the morning. (LOL, happy birthday, Chloe! Your first present is a paternity test result!) Which Daniel of course overhears as he arrives at the pier.
LOLLLL WHAT IS THIS GUY AT STEPHANIE'S DOOR. "Ian" is all geekery, oversized clothes and long stringy hair, and she's very excited that he's there. Apparently, they're old friends? Stephanie inquires about Ian's computer skills, and he reminds her that in college, he hacked into the school computer mainfraime to say that she filled her PE requirement. LOL, Stephanie was always a corrupt bitch. A little Walking For Fitness never hurt anyone, woman! She flirts with Ian a little to get him to agree to help her before she tells him what she needs, because he totally wants to get in her pants. He implies that if she's asking him for something big, her relationship status is important Stephanie tells Ian that she needs him to access paternity test results. He is confused, because she shouldn't need help getting her own results (LOL), and she tells them they're not her's. Before he asks why she would need somebody else's results, he decides he's better off not knowing. She continually reminds him of these mysterious times she helped him in college. They smile and flirt, and if I stare at them long enough, they kind of look alike.
Will finds Stefano at the mansion, and they have a moment. Stefano confronts Will about his doubts about Sami's engagement, saying he was just as uneasy at first. He says Will is part of the reason he changed his mind, and that he's proud of him. OMG they're adorable. He believes in the power of FAMILY! Will gets emotional because this is the closest he's had to a parental figure actually paying attention to him in, like, his whole life. Later, E.J. announces that the Bradys were unsurprisingly not happy when Sami told them about the engagement, and Stefano tells him not to look so smug. He tells him to be careful, because Rafe or Sami may find out about what Elvis did. Jr. tells Stefano not to say that in the house, and Stefano sees Sami at the door looking pisssssed. Ugh, what now?
Back at the free clinic, a dirty-looking dude tells Melanie he needs something (like, omg, you mean DRUGS?!). She says they only do check-ups and stuff, and he grabs her and has her in a choke hold type thing and calls her a bitch. OMGGGG NATHAN WHERE ARE YOU. SAVE MY BB MELANIEEEEE. Also, Philip may have had a point about how dangerous it is there, I guess.
Philip is drinking alone at the pub, and Brady walks in. Aww, Brady, don't make me tune out of a Philip scene. You ruin everything! Brady doesn't understand why it's not acceptable to drink before five. Brian at the pub is socially irresponsible and serves Brady drinks. Philip is confused that Brady's drinking, and Brady says the booze isn't the problem and he's swearing off everything that is.
Nicole shows up at the bar again, looking sad. She curses E.J. and cries, because what she knows was supposed to put her in charge, and instead, it ruined everything good in her life. Cut to Rafe just outside of the bar. OMFGGGG YOU GUYS. Rafe sees her crying inside, and reminds himself that Victor said to strike when she's vulnerable.
Chloe thinks Daniel should know the truth, which is obviously not going to be THE truth. Hope is in regular clothes, sans bumpit, in what looks to be the courthouse and announces that she's going to prison. Nicole throws a drink in Rafe's face and says, "No." Aaah, courtship.
But, to be honest, if I did score this, I think one story would have sent us over the roof in points. You'll know which one I mean.
***
Philip and Chloe hug it out bitch at the pier. I like Philip and Chloe as friends, whatever. That's all I have to say. Nathan walks by, and apologizes for interrupting whatever is going on. Aww, how considerate! He says he meant to call Philip, and they talk about their hospital brosiness for a little bit before he leaves. Chloe freaks out because Nathan KNOWS about her, and she thought he might have figured it out. Aww, come on Chloe. Nathan, though very adorable, is almost as dense as Daniel. And Philip knows Nathan would run straight to Melanie if he knew.
A Doctor walks into a bar and asks one-night stand/baby mama/old friend etc. for her opinion on the bracelet he wants to give to Chloe to wear to the opera for her birthday tomorrow. He says it's their first public birthday together. LOLLLL REMEMBER WHEN CHLOE WAS CHEATING ON LUCAS, SO DANIEL AND CHLOE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET. haahahaha, I'm mean. He's also excited that he gets to tell people he's pregnant soon. (Oh, Chloe's the one who's pregnant.) Carly gets all uncomfortable, but blames her mood on how much she's been working. Daniel tells her he and Mel are worried about her, since she blames herself for the Bo and Hope debacle. Aww, Daniel and Carly are sweet though. He mentions the baby more, making Carly uncomfortable again. Daniel notices something is up, and then she leaves suddenly.
Stephanie, preventing Melanie from finding out why she's REALLY on the computer at St. Mary's, lies about checking up on Daniel's patient for PR purposes. Crazycakes is totally subtle in hoping that Melanie gets the job at this hospital that is across the town from Nathan. She pulls a psychotic fake-nice act that is cracking me up and freaking Melanie out. As Little Red skips off, Crazy continues to peruse hospital records, but when she comes across Chloe's file, access is denied. She seems surprised. Really? Because a PR person should really be given access to paternity test results, Stephanie. She thinks REALLY hard about what she can do, because if Chloe blows up Philip and Melanie, it'll blow up Nathan and her, and her life depends on it. AND OMG SHE HAS AN IDEA!
Sami and E.J. make out in the SUPER SECRET LIVING ROOM at the Dimera mansion, and so what a shock when Stefano walks in on this. Will walks into the room and tries to hold back his vom as Sami's going on about the wedding. "YOU SHOULDN'T BE WEARIN' WHITE AND HE CAN'T AFFORD NO RAAAAANG." Will points out that Sami's had about 29309 weddings, and for some reason thinks she can have a traditional one. Will is obviously my voice on the show, and see that is so WRONG (and then factor in WHOM she's marrying!). Sami acts indignant while Will tells her things she needs to hear, and she wonders why Will wasn't so mean when she was with Rafe. Will tells her, just as he sees Elvis walk into the foyer, that Rafe was different because THAT could have worked. LOL, sneaky bitch. I love Will. He's awesome. EJ hugs Sami as Will leaves the house. LOLLLL okay, Samanther. You say marrying him is what's best for your kids, but she is so going to lose~ Will over it. Bitch, please. Anyway, when E.J. asks if she's okay, she says Will was a "walk in the park" compared to her grandma and dad.
Meanwhile, at the pub, Caroline is complaining about Hope's lack of lawyer when Roman gets a call from Sami saying she has something to tell him. He knows something's up because when she calls him "daddy" (no dirty joke, PLEASE), she's either totaled the car or gotten a D in Spanish. When she replies "Si, si senor," he calls her Samantha Jean. LOLLL. IDK it was actually kind of cute. She tells him she'll see him at the Pub.
Sami and E.J. show up at the pub, but LOL, Caroline doesn't want E.J. present when Sami tells them her news. Oh, Caroline Bluth, you have bigger problems! Sami breaks the news of her engagement, trying to assure them that she's happy. Roman believes that she really has lost her mind. EJ says he understands why they'd be upset, and Roman reminds him that they both have clear memories. Come on, E.J. If somebody raped Sydney, you know you would KILL that guy. So yeah. You're kind of lucky Roman hasn't shot you yet, today. He makes this whole speech about how he loves Sami and respects her and hopes Sydney will learn from them setting such a good example. GAG. Okay. The Bradys aren't buying it, of course, and now Sami refuses to talk to Roman alone, because she WANTS everybody's approval, but if they don't give it to her, then she'll just cut them off. Oh my god.
Ew, at the Kiriakis mansion, Brady is like...ravishing Nicole. He makes me uncomfortable now. Assaulting a woman after sex does that to a guy. And you know what? I just ate, so excuse me while I phone in the recap of their scenes. After they pant and undress each, Nicole wants to take this somewhere a little more private. What? The common areas of the mansion where crazy people live? Not private enough? Crazy Viv can walk in, at any time, on her husband's ex-wife and her husband's grandson ~fornicating. It's a moot point, though, when Brady freaks out decides everything going on here is WRONG. (Seriously, Brady. You forgot the production crew, cameras and cheesy music. GET IT? Because Nicole used to be in PORN!) "What is wrong with you, we were about to make love!" So tender, Nikki. Brady compares sex with Nicole to a drug, and then goes into asshole mode. He basically says he told her he loved her, only to use her for sex, and he doesn't care about her. Brady is DONE with her! Asshole. Please die now.
Rafe is sick of playing by the rules, so he calls a secret person who's surprised he has his number. Rafe tells his phone friend that there's more where that came from. I get the feeling this is a 900 number. Rafe needs help to woo Nicole. He waits at the beach for this mysterious other person and OH MY GOD, LOL. It's Victor. Um, odd scene pairing plus the "beach" setting? EXTRA POINTS. Rafe tells Victor that he has proof that Nicole has something on E.J, and Vic wonders why he should care. Victor thinks they have different ideas about what E.J. "has coming to him." Rafe wants him to lose Sami, whereas Victor wants him to lose an appendage or two. Victor calls E.J. a putz when Rafe tells him what he knows. I love funny Victor. Since Rafe can't use the evidence he stole from Nicole, he needs Victor's help in getting her to tell on Elvis. Victor gives Rafe advice in hopes that he can separate her from Brady, and says he'll owe Rafe a big one. He can pay for their wedding okay. The advice is basically, "she acts tough, but she has a weak spot." Rafe needs to know Nicole's weakness, and Victor reminds him that Nicole was a PORN STAR. OMG PRAISE KANYESUS, THEY'RE ACTUALLY BRINGING THIS UP. MY DAY IS MADE, I AM DYING. THIS IS THE GREATEST THING EVER IN THE HISTORY OF "AOOL." I LOVE PORNSTAR NICOLE. Anyway, Rafe wants Victor to tell him something he didn't already know, and Victor tells him about Nicole's dad forcing her into porn and that she is a broken little girl, just looking for her knight in shining armor. SO HE TELLS RAFE TO MAKE A MOVE. OMG GG-gdsgjfoifdojjdso I CAN'T. YOU GUYS. YOU GUYYYYYYYYS. He needs to convince Nicole that he can help her, and she'll give Rafe what she wants. OMG I AM SHAKING AND CRYING.
Philip drops off Melanie at the free clinic so she could complete her hours there, and he is NOT impressed, even though it's a FREE clinic that was just opened. He, too, is really hoping she gets the job at St. Mary's. He and Stephanie are m2b. Apparently Sister Anne missed her appointment with Melanie. Random. Anyway, Philly doesn't want to leave her alone in a ~dangerous neighborhood. AWW. He's presh when he's not cheating on his wife. She mocks him for freaking out in the ghetto. Salem's ghetto is probably just the one street that has a broken street light. That and the pier. She assures him that she's perfectly fine, and that she's working with another doctor, so of course it's Nathan! Philip is clearly very comfortable with them working together on a more regular basis. They'll flirt over flu shots and figure out that they're dating/married to crazy people. So, naturally, Philip acts more awkward. He and Nathan trade territorial banter before Nathan remembers that Melanie is actually in the room. Melanie is uncomfortable.
Chloe meets Daniel at the bar, and he thinks blue looks great on her. It is orange's complimentary color. Duh, Daniel. He lets her open ONE of her gifts (that she just saw him hiding) on the day before her birthday, so of course it's a box that says "baby" on it. Dan's all sentimental about his first present for his child, and I'm loling at Chloe's paaaaiiin. She' tries to convince Dan she's happy before she excuses herself to the ladies' room. Aaaand, in walks Sister Anne. I've heard this joke before. A nun and a doctor walk into a bar... Anyway. She explains to Daniel why she missed her appointment with Melanie, and let me tell you, it's a soap storyline all on its own! There's a 15-year-old pregnant girl in labor and a drunken mother! He invites Sister Anne to meet his fiance. Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh oh no no.
Carly is at bar again, but it looks like she forgot something. She sees Chloe at the bathroom freaking out, and turns to see Dan and Anne (lolrhyme) sitting together. Oh, Chloe. You were always worried that CARLY was the hussy who'd steal your man, you didn't even THINK about the nun. iCarly walks over to Danne (OTP), and she explains that she came back for her sunglasses. Sister Anne excuses herself before she even got to meet Daniel's fiance. Carly sees the humor in a nun at a bar. Daniel gets a phone call and has an emergency he has to tend to, so he asks Carly to check on Chloe. She calls Chloe to tell her that the coast is clear, but they need to talk before they go home. They talk on the pier and Carly says everything's okay for now, and her test results will be in first thing in the morning. (LOL, happy birthday, Chloe! Your first present is a paternity test result!) Which Daniel of course overhears as he arrives at the pier.
LOLLLL WHAT IS THIS GUY AT STEPHANIE'S DOOR. "Ian" is all geekery, oversized clothes and long stringy hair, and she's very excited that he's there. Apparently, they're old friends? Stephanie inquires about Ian's computer skills, and he reminds her that in college, he hacked into the school computer mainfraime to say that she filled her PE requirement. LOL, Stephanie was always a corrupt bitch. A little Walking For Fitness never hurt anyone, woman! She flirts with Ian a little to get him to agree to help her before she tells him what she needs, because he totally wants to get in her pants. He implies that if she's asking him for something big, her relationship status is important Stephanie tells Ian that she needs him to access paternity test results. He is confused, because she shouldn't need help getting her own results (LOL), and she tells them they're not her's. Before he asks why she would need somebody else's results, he decides he's better off not knowing. She continually reminds him of these mysterious times she helped him in college. They smile and flirt, and if I stare at them long enough, they kind of look alike.
Will finds Stefano at the mansion, and they have a moment. Stefano confronts Will about his doubts about Sami's engagement, saying he was just as uneasy at first. He says Will is part of the reason he changed his mind, and that he's proud of him. OMG they're adorable. He believes in the power of FAMILY! Will gets emotional because this is the closest he's had to a parental figure actually paying attention to him in, like, his whole life. Later, E.J. announces that the Bradys were unsurprisingly not happy when Sami told them about the engagement, and Stefano tells him not to look so smug. He tells him to be careful, because Rafe or Sami may find out about what Elvis did. Jr. tells Stefano not to say that in the house, and Stefano sees Sami at the door looking pisssssed. Ugh, what now?
Back at the free clinic, a dirty-looking dude tells Melanie he needs something (like, omg, you mean DRUGS?!). She says they only do check-ups and stuff, and he grabs her and has her in a choke hold type thing and calls her a bitch. OMGGGG NATHAN WHERE ARE YOU. SAVE MY BB MELANIEEEEE. Also, Philip may have had a point about how dangerous it is there, I guess.
Philip is drinking alone at the pub, and Brady walks in. Aww, Brady, don't make me tune out of a Philip scene. You ruin everything! Brady doesn't understand why it's not acceptable to drink before five. Brian at the pub is socially irresponsible and serves Brady drinks. Philip is confused that Brady's drinking, and Brady says the booze isn't the problem and he's swearing off everything that is.
Nicole shows up at the bar again, looking sad. She curses E.J. and cries, because what she knows was supposed to put her in charge, and instead, it ruined everything good in her life. Cut to Rafe just outside of the bar. OMFGGGG YOU GUYS. Rafe sees her crying inside, and reminds himself that Victor said to strike when she's vulnerable.
Previews
Chloe thinks Daniel should know the truth, which is obviously not going to be THE truth. Hope is in regular clothes, sans bumpit, in what looks to be the courthouse and announces that she's going to prison. Nicole throws a drink in Rafe's face and says, "No." Aaah, courtship.
Monday, August 16, 2010
slower updates, sad times. I need a bumpit.
I figured I should probably note that recaps are going to start being posted every other day. I'm going to try to keep up with the show via Hulu, to get Monday/Wednesday/Friday covered, but because of school I won't be home to watch on those days.
urelated gif, but it should make you feel better. idk.
urelated gif, but it should make you feel better. idk.
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